If you haven’t read Part I, check it out here—>Hysterectomy In Your 30’s Part I: An Agonizing End to Torment
It’s been one week since my hysterectomy. There it is, one of the parts of my body that I hate the most. It’s on display for thousands of people to ogle. But even more than ogling, I want a message to be sent. I want awareness and understanding to be spread. The picture you mainly see of me may look healthy and happy, but this is my illness. This is the invisible illness you don’t get to see.
Having A Hysterectomy
As sad as I was last week, that didn’t stop my hysterectomy from happening. The minutes in pre-op seemed to pass like seconds. Before I knew it I was laying on an operating table with my wrists strapped down. I was thinking of my babies being born, then I was waking in agony. Day surgery nurses weren’t sure what to give me once I was maxed out on narcotics and still waking in pain. One of my doctors showed up and pumped morphine in, knowing that I’ve been on strong pain meds for the last few years.
My surgery start time was 7:40 and I came out of recovery at around 12:30. I waited in day surgery for my room until around 7:00 PM. When we finally got to my room Dirty Gentleman and my sis helped me get settled and waited until I was comfortable on my breakthrough morphine and headed out. As usual, my bladder did not awake for quite some time. That first night sucked as it usually does. My catheter came out at 9:00 PM and I another was inserted at 1:00 AM to drain my overfull bladder. Then again at 6:00 AM, and again at 11:00 AM. After the third time, they taught me how to catheterize myself, which is way easier then it sounds. Finally, at around 3:00 PM my bladder decided to awake and work! I was thrilled, and so were all the nurses on the floor.
Emotions Keep Taking Me Over
In the first 48 hours, I don’t think you really have time to reflect on what’s happened. Your body and mind are solely focused on healing. Okay, don’t judge me for this, but I seriously have this song stuck in my head while grieving in my weird way for losing my mutated uterus, Mystery Song? You should probably check it out haha. While I’m glad to not have a period, and I’m very much out of the horrendous pain I was in and hopefully will be for some time, it still feels weird. I feel way too young to never have another period ever again. I feel a little less womanly for sure. Less feminine, and definitely a lot older. I haven’t made sense of it yet, hopefully, at some point, I will though.
Until then, you can struggle through my emotions with me. My uterus was covered in adenomyosis and I had two large sections in my pelvis excised, ablazed and sent to pathology for testing. They did a cystoscopy, if you’re not familiar with that, check out my post on it from last year, There I sat with a bunch of old guys… Trust me when I say, it’s definitely something you want them to perform while you’re under anesthetic. Other than that, you can check out my incisions in the photo above. All 2018 are from last week. She did a beautiful job but you still have had organs removed and tissue burned and cut, and it hurts. It hurts in more ways than just the physical.
The Details You Want to Know
If you’re scheduled for a Total Laparoscopic Hysterectomy, I hope this helped you somewhat in getting your mind ready. I always find it easier when I know whats going on. Yes, they take your cervix and sew your vagina shut at the very top from the inside out. Just in case you were wondering ;). I know quite a few women who don’t realize everything is cut out except your ovaries if you’re able to keep them. They just float around like little astronauts in space afterward. It’s exhausting and somewhat traumatic, but you have to do what you have to so you can survive.
Questions? Words? Advice? Post them below as always, I love your comments <3